There’s something about a cheap 4×4 and a muddy winter’s day that instantly turns sensible adults into complete idiots — and that’s exactly what happened when we headed down to the Slindon 4×4 site with a pair of Suzuki Jimnys.
The crew for this adventure was Stu, Jason, Lee, Ryan and Tom. Ryan and Lee already knew their way around the Jimnys and had taken them out a few times before, but once the rest of us got involved, things escalated very quickly.
The weather couldn’t have been more perfect for chaos. It was deep winter, soaking wet, freezing cold and the entire site had turned into one giant mud bath. Naturally, that meant every lane instantly became a challenge to see how fast we could hit it before getting completely stuck.
And we got stuck. A lot.
Every few minutes one of the Jimnys would disappear axle-deep into mud or sink into a puddle that turned out to be far deeper than expected. Out came the winches, tow ropes and plenty of laughing while someone tried to explain how they definitely “had enough speed for that one”.
The funniest part was that everyone had a turn driving, and as always happens when it’s not your own vehicle, mechanical sympathy completely disappears. Suddenly people were launching these little Jimnys into massive puddles, bouncing through ruts and charging into muddy lakes just to see if they’d make it out the other side.
To be fair to the Jimnys, they took an unbelievable amount of punishment.
The only slight concern was that we’d actually driven the cars there — and needed to drive them home afterwards. No trailers. No recovery trucks. Just blind optimism and a pressure washer stop planned for the journey back.
And then came the drive back along the A27.
Somewhere during the day, Ryan’s Jimny had clearly suffered enough and the rear suspension had completely given up. Riding back in it felt like sitting inside a bouncing castle at 60mph, with the whole thing hopping down the dual carriageway while we tried not to laugh too hard.
After surviving the journey home, we stopped off at Selmeston to wash the Jimnys down, although I’m not sure a quick rinse really helped after the abuse they’d taken all day.
Despite the mud, breakdowns, winching and questionable driving decisions, it ended up being one of those days that perfectly sums up why cheap off-roaders are so much fun. No lap times, no polishing, no worrying about stone chips — just mates, mud and complete chaos.